This brief, easy-to-read e-book gives clear steps to manage conflict better in your personal and professional lives. It’s a free, downloadable pdf. Just click on the book image and the book opens up.
"Getting to Yes: Negotiating Without Giving In" by Roger Fisher and William Ury
This classic focuses on finding agreement that includes both sides’ interests by following four principles: 1. Separate the people from the problem; 2. Focus on the interests rather than positions; 3. Generate a variety of options before settling on an agreement; and 4. Insist that the agreement be based on objective criteria.
"The Conflict Pivot: Turning Conflict into Peace of Mind" by Tammy Lenski.
Lenski shares three pivots we can take in the midst of conflict that help us 1. Look at the situation in its reality rather than our perception, 2. Figure out why it bothers us and, 3. Help move us forward so we don’t stay stuck in the past. Why something upsets us stems from six conflict hooks on which we get caught. She helps the reader examine which hook or hooks are ours so that when something happens we understand our reaction and can improve upon it.
"Non-Violent Communication: A Language of Life" by Marshall Rosenberg
Another classic that teaches how to communicate with empathy and focus on needs without judgement. Rosenberg teaches that to communicate in a non-violent way, we need to express ourselves honestly and listen honestly. He describes four actions to improve communication: 1. Take a moment to observe before you react; 2. Notice what impact your observation has on your feelings; 3. Identify the need that lead to those feelings, and; 4. Create a request of the other person as to how they can fulfill your personal need.
"We Need to Talk: How To Have Conversations That Matter" by Celeste Headlee"
After decades of conducting interviews, Hadlee realized that she wasn’t that great of a listener. She shares research and techniques to improve how to have a conversation in which we really pay attention to each other in a kind and balanced way. This book is good for all relationships - personal, professional and societal.
"The Promise of Mediation: Responding to Conflict Through Empowerment and Recognition." By Robert A. Baruch Bush and Joseph P. Folger.
While this is obviously about mediation, the techniques discussed here are helpful to all wanting to improve their interpersonal relationships. By focusing on Empowerment and Recognition in any conflict, you can find growth, understanding and resolution.